Dear, whoever it may concern,
How do you just leave? How do you walk away and not look back? How are you okay with the fact that you may never be apart of your child’s life, someone who is half you. I hope you realize what you are missing by leaving, I hope you realize what you’ll never be apart of anymore. They won’t know when they’re babies, but when your little girls five and it’s her first day of kindergarten, she’ll know. When all the other daddies are walking the girls to class, and only their mom’s are, they know. When your little boy want’s to learn about football, but their mom knows almost nothing about it. When your boy wants to play a sport and all these other dads are out on the field, they’ll know. They’ll know when it’s fathers day, and they don’t want to take part in the father’s day activities.
I hope you realized what you’ll miss when they’re teenagers. The first dances, the first kisses, girlfriends/boyfriends, the heartbreaks, the driver’s licenses, and the milestones. I hope you realize, that they’ll never truly trust you and they’ll always wait for you to leave again if you do go back. I hope you realize, you’ll never be able to get back the time you’ve lost. You’ll never have those memories, and you’ll never be able to make them. If you run off, if you leave, if you never truly look back, you’ll never get those chances. How can you look at yourself in the mirror every day, knowing that you left behind half of you? How do you stand to not tell people about your children, how do you not think about them.
Go back. Regardless of how long, regardless of how little you have to offer, go back. You should be apart of your children’s life, you should be around regardless. Because it’s the little things, those memories, that you should want to have. The homecomings, the boyfriends/girlfriends, the heartbreaks and tears, the drivers licesnse, the graduations, and everything in between. Your kids may never fully trust you, and they may not fully want you in their lives, but you should want to be a part of it, and you should be willing to try. Leaving their mother is different than leaving them. If you don’t want to be with the mother, that’s one thing. But don’t leave your children. Even when it’s been years, and you feel like we’re better off, they aren’t. Even when you feel like you can’t financially support, you should still try. Little things will always matter.
Don’t let pride, and embarrassment keep you from them. They will cry, yell, and be so angry when they fully understand, but they will always be open to you being in their lives. They will always open up to you, and let you be a part of it. Don’t let the fact that you left, keep you from going back. Even when you don’t know them, when it fully based on the fact they’re only half of you, go back. Because the longer you take, the harder it’ll be.
The girl who’s father left her.
Love, Megan Anne
<3 <3 <3